Accepting Others

When I was younger, I thought everyone should be like me, and since they weren’t, I stayed busy trying to change them. My husband Dave and I are very different, and for years we had a lot of arguments that were caused by my trying to change his personality to be more like mine. I treated my children the same way.

I brought this same mindset into my work. After we started Joyce Meyer Ministries and it grew to the point where we had about 50 employees, I was frustrated all the time because I kept trying to get people to complete tasks they were not gifted to do. I was critical of others, and I’m sure my dissatisfaction with people made them feel like they were unacceptable and had failed.

I almost wore myself out trying to change people until I realized everyone is not supposed to be like I am! We are all born with different God-given gifts and temperaments, and we were never meant to be the same.

1 Corinthians chapter 12 puts it so well. It says that we are all part of the Body of Christ. And just like a physical body, it is made up of many parts (see verse 4).

The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” …There should be no division in the body, but its parts should have equal concern for each other…(1 Corinthians 12:21, 24-25 NIV).

God has created us to be unique individuals. For instance, Dave and I have very different gifts and personalities—and that is a good thing. He is strong in areas where I am weak, and I am strong in different areas. The greatest thing I can do is encourage Dave to be himself—to be the exact person God created him to be.

Over the years, it has also helped me tremendously to learn about people’s various personality types. There are many good books on the subject, and they have helped me to better understand myself and the people in my life. In fact, once you begin to really understand the various gifts and temperaments that others have, it allows you to appreciate their strengths in a whole new way.

My sons, David and Daniel, are great examples. David is CEO of Hand Hope, Joyce Meyer Ministries’ World Missions. And Daniel is CEO of Joyce Meyer Ministries’ U.S. Operations.

David is a lot like me. He has a very “Type A” personality—what many people describe as a choleric personality. He is self-motivated, has very strong leadership skills and is good at making decisions. Now, Daniel also has a lot of the choleric traits as well, but his personality also includes a good deal of “sanguine.” Those with sanguine personalities like to have fun and are usually the life of the party.

So, both of my sons accomplish a lot because of their choleric traits, but Daniel handles his schedule a bit differently because of his sanguine traits. While David is very scheduled and methodical, Daniel is more likely to do business on the phone while flying down a mountain on a snowboard! They both do a great job, but they have two very different ways of doing it, and that’s okay.

Studying this subject has helped me immensely as I have learned how to accept and get along with people. I realized that everyone could not be like I am, no matter how much I wanted them to be. God has created each of us to be different, and when we work together, one person’s strengths compensate for others’ weaknesses.

We all have areas in which we truly need to change, but only God can change us. Learning to accept people and help them feel valuable is one of the best gifts we can give them. Sure, we may need to confront certain bad behaviors at times, but if we constantly find fault with others, then we need to look at our own attitude instead of their behavior.

The greatest thing you can be is yourself. And one of the greatest things you can do for others is to encourage their unique gifts and personalities and help them to be who God created them to be.

_{Adapted from the book Authentically, Uniquely You by Joyce Meyer. Copyright 2021 by Joyce Meyer. Published by FaithWords. All rights reserved.}