God's Strategy for Overcoming Anger

It’s easy to want to hold on to your anger, especially when someone has deeply hurt you. But the truth is, giving it to God and trusting Him to make things right is actually easier than continuing to live with it.

Maybe this is where you are today. If someone has mistreated you or hurt you in some way, it can be overwhelming and feel like the offense will never go away or get any easier. Trust me, I’ve been there!

However, the good news is, God wants to be your Vindicator (see Job 19:25). He sees your pain and knows what you are going through. You can choose to release the offense to Him and trust Him to make wrong things right.

I know it’s not easy, and God may not move as quickly as you’d like Him to or do things the way you’d like Him to do them. But He will vindicate you if you’ll trust Him and do things His way.

Facing My Anger Problem

I know what it’s like to live angry. My dad was an angry person, and he was very abusive. When I left home at the age of 18, I thought I would be free of the pain and anger I had experienced most of my life because I was leaving it behind me.

It took a long time for me to realize that although I left that situation, I actually took the problem with me. It was etched in my soul—in my thinking, my emotions, the way I talked and how I dealt with relationships.

So, I spent years experiencing all kinds of problems and manifesting destructive, dysfunctional behaviors that I blamed on everything and everybody else.

Instead of taking responsibility for my anger and the hurt in my soul, I would say things like, “I wouldn’t be angry if Dave would pay more attention to me” or “I wouldn’t be angry if my boss paid me more to do this job.” Whatever my problem was, it was always somebody else’s fault!

I finally realized that in order to be free, we have to face truth and take responsibility for our behavior. Blaming other people or circumstances and making excuses never changes anything.

It also amazes me how each life affects so many others. None of us are an island unto ourselves. When we are hurting and dealing with things like anger, offense, bitterness and unforgiveness, it comes out in so many ways we never imagine and can ultimately hurt those we love the most.

Thank God, I eventually learned that I needed to let Jesus deal with what was going on inside of me so I could experience the freedom He wanted me to have (see John 10:10). That freedom is for you, too. And it all begins with bringing your pain and anger to Him.

When Angry, Do This First…

The best thing we can do when we’re struggling with anger is go to God immediately. Don’t give in to the temptation to repeatedly think about what someone did to you. Instead, make the choice to give it to God by asking for His help right away.

I want to look at Ephesians 4:26-27 (AMPC) because it’s such an important part of gaining freedom in this area. It says, When angry, do not sin; do not ever let your wrath (your exasperation, your fury or indignation) last until the sun goes down. Leave no [such] room or foothold for the devil [give no opportunity to him].

It’s not the emotion of anger itself that is sinful, but it’s what we choose to do with it that really matters. We will all be tempted to act upon our anger, but that’s when we need to ask the Holy Spirit for help to exercise self-control.

Try this: The next time you are tempted to defend yourself, get revenge, hate someone or hold on to your anger, turn it over to Him.

You may be thinking, But Joyce, you don’t understand what they did to me. It’s so hard to forgive—I just can’t do it!

Believe me, I do understand how hard it can be. I’ve been exactly where you are right now and understand what you’re feeling. But God never tells us to do something without giving us the ability to do it, and you can release your anger to Him and forgive if you will trust Him to help you. I learned this lesson myself and was better for it—and I believe it will be the same for you!

The Bible has the answers we need to successfully defeat anger—God’s Word is full of power and it has the ability to change our lives! (See Hebrews 4:12.) So, I want to share just a few scriptures that you can study and meditate on to help you manage anger God’s way.

Romans 12:21 (AMPC) says, Do not let yourself be overcome by evil, but overcome (master) evil with good.

When you fight evil with evil, you’ll never win; but if you fight evil with good, you will win every time!

Ecclesiastes 7:9 (AMPC) gives this instruction: Do not be quick in spirit to be angry or vexed, for anger and vexation lodge in the bosom of fools.

There is always a price to pay for anger. People who are offended and stay angry often become filled with bitterness and resentment, letting the enemy steal the best God has for them.

James 1:19-20 (AMPC) says, ...Let every man be quick to hear [a ready listener], slow to speak, slow to take offense and to get angry. For man’s anger does not promote the righteousness God [wishes and requires].

Make a determined decision to do what the Word says, but don’t strive to do it in your own strength. Spend time with God, tell Him what you need, and allow Him to strengthen you and change you from the inside out. Spend time quietly waiting on Him with an open heart to hear what He has to say to you.

I also encourage you to study these and other scriptures about anger, forgiveness, and love. Take the time to write down verses that will remind you to be slow to get angry and overcome evil with good. Meditate on them and allow them to get deep down on the inside of you. You can even speak them out loud as declarations of your faith in God to help you.

Regardless of how long you have dealt with anger or what has happened up to this point, always remember that God loves you and He has a good plan for your life. There is no sense wasting your life being angry about something that happened years ago or even something that happened earlier today.

It’s never too soon to get started. I encourage you to take just a few moments right now to pray the following:

“Lord, I need Your help to deal with my anger. Please show me truth and help me to understand the root causes. Help me to run to You first and not act on feelings that can cause problems for myself and others. Thank You for Your love, grace, mercy, and the power of Your Holy Spirit in my life to change me. I know I can only do it through Your strength. In Jesus' name, amen.”

Remember, all things are possible with God (see Matthew 19:26). In Christ, you don’t have to live an angry life.