Getting Out of My Own Way

Before I met Jesus, my life was about me. I had started drinking at just 12 years old, and eventually became addicted. As a teenager and into my adult years—even after I was married with two children—everything was about my next drink, my next suit, my next car. It was so bad that every month, we had to borrow money just to feed our kids…

Then one day my wife, Sue, called me at work. “I want you to come home now,” she said. At first I refused, but when she insisted, I knew something wasn’t right.

I went home to find her standing in our living room, holding two trash bags filled with all my worldly belongings. She told me she had a police order, and that I had 30 minutes to leave before I was arrested.

This set me on a path I’d never expected. We ended up getting divorced, I moved in with my parents, went through AA, and ultimately threw myself into work.

For a year and a half, I was separated from my family, and every night I realized how much I missed them. Eventually I started doing really well in business, stopped drinking, and got my own condo. Yet my life was still about me, what I would do, and how I could succeed in the advertising business.

Then one day I got curious and wanted to check out the place my kids were going to church, because they were always talking about it. It was a megachurch and unlike anything I’d been to before. I was a bit suspicious, but I wanted to try to rebuild a relationship with my kids, so I stayed through the service and ended up hearing the Gospel like I’d never heard it before.

When I gave my life to Jesus a few days later, it was as if blinders came off my eyes. Up to that point, my view had just been so centrally pinpointed to me and my life that I could only see a tiny bit of reality. But when God showed up, He opened my eyes to an entire beautiful world I could never have seen before—that represented the rest of my life and the BEST of my life.

From that point on, I found myself no longer thinking about myself as much. I started thinking about my children and my ex-wife, and wondered, What would be best for them?

God continued to work on my heart and made a way for Sue and I to reconnect in a business setting. Six months later, we got remarried and we’ve been together serving God and helping people ever since, and she has been one of my biggest cheerleaders in every step God’s led me to take.

Soon after I gave my life to Jesus, I started reading the book God’s Smuggler, which ignited a passion in my heart to help the persecuted church. As I was reading, I prayed, “Lord, if You can ever use me like that, I’m just making myself available.”

Four years later, He answered my prayer through my first mission trip to the Soviet Union.

After a 14-hour train ride, we arrived in Moscow, where I saw a man who looked very down. Despite the language barrier, God strongly impressed on my heart to give him a Bible, so I did. He didn’t say anything in reply, but he received it as if it was straight from heaven.

Not long after that, someone told me, “This guy has been in a Siberian prison for 26 years for being a Christian—you just gave him his first Bible.”

That was the moment I got hooked on giving. Over the course of the next few years, God led me to start Crisis Aid International—an organization focused on serving children and families in crisis throughout East Africa and the United States.

Then in 2003, I connected with David Meyer, CEO of Hand of Hope, as he was speaking at a local church, which led to us having a great conversation about missions. When he asked, “How can we help you?” that was the beginning of a partnership that has yielded unbelievable fruit for over two decades.

Together, Crisis Aid International partners with Hand of Hope to:

• Distribute millions of meals to people each year.
• Provide disaster relief for people in the aftermath of storms, famines, wars and other crises.
• Offer free medical care through our Hand of Hope Pediatric Specialty Clinic in East Africa. Here, we treat children and families who suffer from the effects of malnutrition and other ailments but can’t afford to see a doctor.
• Rescue women and girls out of sex trafficking. Through our women’s home in East Africa, we are helping these precious individuals escape (so far, we’ve rescued over 500 women!), and we also provide counseling, job training, housing, food, and other things they need to help them recover.

Every day I stand more in awe of God’s ability to transform us. When I was focused on myself and obtained a lot of the things I was obsessed with, I could never seem to find happiness. But ever since I’ve been on this journey with God, He’s changed my heart and expanded my life more than I ever imagined.

As someone who’s experienced life both from a selfish perspective and an others-focused one, I have a challenge for you. For the next 24 hours (or even 12), put your own desires on the shelf and focus on how you can help the people around you. Open your eyes wider, and God will show you a need you can meet. No matter how big or small it is, when you do it not from the perspective of What’s in it for me? but rather, Because it’s the right thing to do, it will bring a freedom into your life that is indescribable. I can’t wait for you to experience it!